No ordinary soldier

When aunty Esther tried to discourage her coworker from gambling and to trust the Lord, her coworker said, "I cannot trust God the way you do. You are a general, I am only an ordinary soldier."

I am filled with nothing but great admiration for aunty. The book of Hebrews says that we are to emulate the faith of our leaders.

"Lord, I don't want to go through the hardships like aunty Esther, but I would sure like to be a general and not an ordinary soldier." Please be gentle with me as you work in me to make me one.

And I pray for the ladies in my charge too, that they will be great in faith, like generals and not ordinary soldiers."

Snuggles

My little niece came snuggling up to me during the morning worship today.

She was seated with my brother and sis-in-law on the pew across the aisle. I turned my head and smiled at her. She smiled coyly and then quietly made her way to my side. I put her on my lap and held her close to me. She sure knows how to win my heart. It felt really nice. At times like these, I miss having children of my own.

Out of this world

The last week has been spent on hardly any other work except hosting aunty Esther. I don't know how I landed myself with this massive task of documenting her life story. I have never met anyone like her in all my life.

This elderly, single woman has already, with no formal training, translated the NT and now into doing the OT for a small people group (only 2000 of them) that until I met her, had never heard of. Through her, a whole movement of the Gospel is happening not just among them, but also among other people groups as well. She has started an orphanage and schools (And she keeps telling me, "I am a timid person.") It's like meeting the apostle Paul... every day of her life is filled with the kind of dangers and hardship that he faced.

If one were to look at all that she has accomplished (without meeting her), one would imagine a hard nosed, gungho, tough, driving woman. Yet having been with her this past week, all I see is a humble, gentle, tender hearted person with such an unrivalled love for Jesus.

I pray that God will also lead me to accomplish great exploits for Him and His glory without any of it ever getting to my head.

P.S. hahaha... I hope that doesn't include being single!! (But whatever He wills lah)

What happened last Sunday

I had been wanting to write about my attempt to take Dad to church on July 10... Mum scrapped the family car about two months ago because it had passed it's 10 year life. Wah! No car... tough!

I arranged to stay over at KC's place on Sat 9th night as she lives just a stone's throw from Dad's nursing home. She was happy to take Dad and myself to church on Sunday, and then to send us to Mum's after the service.

On Saturday 9th evening, I had invited CL and IT over to my home for dinner. CL as you know is the friend I met on my way to KL. We had a great time. The three of us are going through similar struggles. IT and I related so well with her. We told her the difference Jesus made in our lives. It was already 11 pm but the sharing was soooooooooo good, it was hard to stop.

I had promised KC that I would be at her home by 11 pm!!

So anyway, by the time I got to KC's, it was almost midnight. Paiseh the lights were already switched off. I had to wake the maid.

I was still excited from the good time with CL, plus the stress of rushing to KC's, plus sleeping at a new place... it was hard to sleep.

Woke up early to pick Dad up for the 8 am service. (I am NOT a morning person!!)

Well after the service, KC had another appointment and so she had to rush to send us to Mum's. Mum was still at church, and of all things, I forgot to bring the housekeys.

Aiyoh!!! Poor Dad. It was 11 am - it was HOT. There was no where to sit. He kept saying, "I'm very hot, I'm very hot. Can I sit down." I felt soooooooooo bad to put my Dad through all that. I let him sit under the hot sun on the stone slab outside my house. I didn't care whether malu or not... I literally went from door to door to see if anyone would let the poor old man in to rest.

I asked my Mum's immediate neighbour since we knew them best. But the neighbours were at church too :-( I finally managed to persuade the Indonesian maid to let us in. But the dog went wild. He snarled his big teeth viciously and was already starting to form in the mouth. The maid tried to control it, but it only turned around and snapped at her. I screamed to tell her never mind! I didn't need another victim to take care of!!

I went knocking from door to door. The Sri Lankan maid four doors away finally let us into the garden after my attempts at explaining to her in gestures and English my predicament. Poor Dad had to sit on uncomfortable garden chairs. I kept apologising to him - I don't think he half understood me.

After what felt like forever, I saw Mum's immediate neighbour drive pass us to go home. What a relief. (But remember, we were four doors away!) Between rushing to get my neighbour's attention before she goes into the house and dragging my poor 76-year-old Dad...

Well, it was half an hour in all that poor Dad had to endure the torture. I think I was pretty traumatized myself.

No win situation?

I have been especially anxious about this the past week. You see, I took Dad for the first service on Sunday. (Another episode that deserves blogging about!) The last time I did took him to church was about a year ago. Then, he was very intently interested in the service. He sang the songs and engaged himself with people.

This time around, he was more detached and lost in his own world. I felt really sad... I felt like I am losing my Dad more and more. I even toyed with the idea of taking him home to look after him myself. But I got nightmares thinking about it. I just felt the entire weight being pushed on me. It's so painful to see Dad spending his last days this way. There just seems to be a no win situation.

God's little surprises

I decided to work from home today as I was up till early this morning trying to finish off an article. My energy level hasn't been the same since I fell sick the last time. I seem to tire so quickly.

JJ surprised me by coming over to my place to work this afternoon. It was so nice to have company. I know it's silly but I actually got teary when she said she'd come over.

God does know how to send me little surprises like that to make my day. Little surprises come because of big hearts. Thank you Lord for JJ.

Harvest time!

Here is a series of SMSs from JT that I received over the past week that encouraged me. JT is a domestic helper, the key person that I discipled in my Filipino ministry in church. We have been friends for more than 10 years now. She has moved on to another church but we are still in touch with each other.

Tue, 12 July, 2204 hrs
AK & JK chose the verse and so excited ko they teach us how to memorise exactly wat we learn in our "2:7 Growing Strong in God's Family." Wat they do is they teach the verse to us and explain word or line by line wd personal testimony. so dat it wl be more easy to understand.

2217 hrs
We finish 4 assurances. Salvation, ans. prayer, forgiveness and victory. AK & JK will take turn to teach. just now b4 dinner JK called me and ask me to do or teach this friday which is assurance of guidance pro 3:5-6. this are my news to u. after they try me in leading worship now they will try me another thing. and i told her already dat yes i will try, so pray 4 me cos I have 2 nites only to prepare. Thank you A__.

2246 hrs
June 24 AK had school camp at the new school in KM Sec School, so our home grp went there dat nite, AK preach the GOOD news and the BAD news to abt 36 students some sec 3 and some sec 1. After he preach he divide them into groups of 6, and we home grp people talk to 1 group each and share abt the message. 2 girls n my grp received the Lord. Thank GOD 3 dat. Am having fun with God n with my home grp.

Friday, 15 July, 1530 hrs
OK A__ and thank you. I've done everything last nite. My hag is ready to go, now am ironing n practising in my head wat to say as introduction. Am nervous n excited at the same time doing it 4HIM. I hope the pastor wont be there 2nite. Hahahah scared mah.

2240 hrs
Thank God A__. All went well. Even AK & JK respond. GOD'salways good even I panic but once I start talking the rest will follow and I feel like talking nonstop, but I have time limit. good nite A_, I'm still at the bus on they way home. Miss U.

2308 hrs
A__ I just reached home. Got dishes to wash. And you know wat the pastor was nt with our group at AK's place. He was here at Ma'am LB's grp. Hahaha answered my wish. Ok I do pray 4U to rest well.

JT has been such a joy to my heart all these years. Some years ago, when JT went home to Philippines for her vacation, she wrote to tell me that she had shared her testimony in church and 5 people came to Christ. She writes me long letters every now and again, or sends me SMSs to keep me updated. Lately, she has started learning how to send emails.

God knows when to send encouragement. How I always thank Him for her.